Insight for the Journey

Integrity is doing the right thing, especially when it costs us. Our lives speak powerfully for Christ when we live that way.

Now the only way you can really measure integrity is when a person is under pressure. When things are going well you can’t really measure integrity. The only way to measure it is to see them under stress, to see them in a situation where it’s going to cost them to tell the truth or do the right thing. Then you can tell.

In a story called “Catch of a Lifetime”, James Lenfestey tells the story of a life-changing experience an 11 year old boy had with his father. Every year his family would go up to their cabin which was on an island in New Hampshire. The cabin was out in the middle of a gorgeous lake. He loved to fish off of the fishing dock. One day he’s on the fishing dock, it’s the day before bass season opens. Now, as an 11 year old kid he’s not fishing for bass. He’s using worms and he’s fishing for sun fish and perch, things like that. He’s been fishing all day long, it’s almost sunset, and his dad comes out to join him. And they are fishing together off the dock. What a beautiful scene!

Pretty soon the sun is going down, the moon is coming out, it’s a beautiful New Hampshire evening. The moon is glistening off the lake. It’s a special time with a father and son in the quiet of the evening. Pretty soon the son gets bored. He decides he wants to practice his casting. Reaching into the tackle box, he takes out a silver lure, ties it on and begins to cast into the lake just for practice. And this goes on for a while in the quiet of the night… and all of a sudden, his fishing rod doubles over. He doesn’t know what he has but it is huge! And his dad has taught him how to work a fish slowly and skillfully to bring it in until the fish kind of wears himself out. And so he is practicing this, bringing the fish in. His Dad is so proud as he watches his son practice what he has taught him. As he raises the fish out of the water, it’s the most magnificent and the largest fish this boy has ever seen. It’s an enormous bass. And he says there in the moon light I looked at my dad, and my dad looked at me and without saying a word, dad reached into his pants pocket, pulled out some matches and he lit a match and checked his watch. It was ten o’clock. Two hours before bass season started.

The dad said “Son, we are going to have to put this fish back. The boy protested, “but dad”, the dad said “No son, there will be other fish.” “But dad, there won’t be other fish like this fish.” 

And the boy looked around, they were there all alone, nobody in sight on a deserted dock at ten o’clock at night. No other boats on the lake. And he thought, “No one will ever know when I caught this fish.” But as he caught his dad’s eye, he realized this was a non-negotiable. He took the fish and lowered him back in the water and with one swish of his powerful tail this enormous bass was gone forever back in the lake.

The eleven year old boy is now a successful architect in New York City. His dad has since died, but he still owns that cabin in New Hampshire. Every year he takes his son and two daughters there and he has taught them how to fish off that same dock. And he says, “I have never, ever caught a fish that magnificent again. But I still see that fish over and over again when as an architect I come up against a tough issue of integrity. Every time I’m under a deadline and I’m tempted to cut corners on drawings. Every time I come up with insight or insider information and I can make a lot of money in the stock market. Every time when it’s ten o’clock on the dock of my life and no one else is around” he said “I see that fish and I remember the lesson my father taught me that integrity is about doing the right thing especially when it costs you.”

Wow! I like that. And it’s true.

Perhaps the greatest character quality for an effective Christian life is integrity. Integrity means that there is a wholeness about our lives, a thorough integration of our beliefs and behavior. We are consistent.

Paul uses a special word picture in 2 Corinthians 1:12 that has always meant a lot to me. He says, “Now this is our boast: Our conscience testifies that we have conducted ourselves in the world, and especially in our relations with you, in the holiness and sincerity that are from God. We have done so not according to worldly wisdom but according to God’s grace.”

Paul says look, “I know there are these critics that are attacking my integrity but I have a clear conscience and I’m telling you we have been on the up and up, we have been sincere, our motives have been holy and I’m promising you that I’m the real deal.”

The word translated “sincerity” in that verse comes from a compound Greek word that literally means “sunshine judged.” The ancients made fine porcelain vases that were very expensive. Sometimes when a vase was heated in the kiln, it would crack. Dishonest merchants would pour pearly white wax over the cracks which would hide the flaws unless the vases were taken outside of the dark shops and held up in the bright sunlight. It was only then, in the revealing light of the sun that the cracks would be obvious. So, honest merchants would advertise their porcelain “heilikrinos” — sunshine judged. In other words, without wax, no cracks, no covering of the flaws. That’s the kind of integrity God wants in us. When sincerity flow from our lives, there’s no deception or embellishing the truth for personal advantage. Paul says, “My life is sunshine-judged.” Can we say that of ourselves?

There’s a great book from 2001 called Lessons from the Top: The 50 Most Successful Business Leaders in America—and What You can Learn from Them by Thomas Neff and James Citrin. Through the guidance of Gallup Poll surveys and other sources, the authors studied who they felt were the top fifty business leaders in the US. Some of them are household names like Bill Gates. Some of the names you would not recognize. But based on the finest research available, these were deemed the top business leaders in the United States. The authors went to each leader, interviewed them and asked “What took you to the top? What has made you so successful?” And the fifty chapters in the book reflect those responses.

At the end of the book the authors collate everything they’ve learned from these fifty people, and they ask “What are the top lessons we can learn about being a successful leader? And they reduced it to six principles that all of these leaders had in common. Do you know what number one was?

The number one principle of becoming a great leader:
“To live with integrity and lead by example.”

Those are their words, not mine. Wow, think about that. The number one quality: to live with integrity and lead by example.

When disciples of Jesus live that way, we are letting our lives be our ministry.

Who do you want to influence? If you want to impact people for Christ, it is imperative that they believe in you and your integrity first. People usually buy into you before they buy into Christ. Your message will always be heard in context with your character.

Many people feel a sense of futility about letting their life be their ministry in the workplace. They may say, “My work is a place where I can’t really make a difference. I really don’t have much influence.” But God wants to use you whatever you’re doing, wherever you’re at, to be a light.

Back on June 24 of this year we got a message from a couple that used to attend Grace but have moved out of state because of work. Their names are Jim & Denis Sherman. This illustrates what awesome things can happen when we let our light shine in the workplace. I asked their permission to share this story. It is written in their own words.

Hello there! My wife & I use to attend Grace before we came to Virginia. We live at Fort Belvior now, and still have our house in Round Lake for us when we return someday. Ok let me just say years ago a contractor named Bill Benson, who I did business with through a building supply company I work through, came up to me & said “Do you believe in Jesus?”. It made me feel weird to be questioned like that, you see I just met Bill that day & was trying to sell him siding, not bibles, so I was lost for words but said “yes I do.”

Well that answer was half hearted and Bill probably saw through it. He said “what are you doing this week after work?” Well my wife was in Iraq & I really didn’t have much going on so I said “nothing”. He said there was a “MALE BIBLE STUDY” and I should come as his guest. I was scared at this male bible study-thing, mainly because I had no clue what it was & really didn’t believe in having faith or God in my life, or at least I thought.

I went, it was different to me seeing guys coming together over studying the Bible and not a football game or something else that guys circle around like crazy fans hanging on each play or word. I sat & listened. Then, Sunday came around & I went to Sunday’s service & saw Rex & the band & many different people around me worshipping. That was different in a good way because I was feeling at ease and enjoying it all. That was really great news to my wife in Iraq when I told her over the phone. She always had faith and God in her life. She always prayed that I would give faith & God a chance. I never thought that way & wasn’t looking for it. But I found Grace Fellowship & kept going until my wife came home from Iraq. Then for the first time in our relationship we went to a Sunday service together. She loved the place, the band, the people, Rex, and the message. We kept going & during this time God blessed us with a beautiful baby boy named Devin. The first time we took him there he was only a few weeks old, we sat towards the back in the dark singing the songs with everyone, and it felt great.

Well shortly after this my wife was offered a position at headquarters in Arlington, Virginia. That was a blessing. We have been here one year and we often talk about home. But what has surprised me is really how much I miss Grace Fellowship and the message I got from you all. That there is a place for me, that worshipping God isn’t always what you think or heard about from others, and that if you just come has you are & let go of the “whatevers” that is holding you back from true happiness and let God into your life, then you will understand “TRUE HAPPINESS”. We miss Grace Fellowship a lot! That’s true! But we didn’t miss the message you sent us while we were there. We have faith & God in our family because of your message. I just wanted to say thank you to Bill Benson, Rex, Grace Fellowship, and God for giving us that. God Bless you all. Jim & Denis Sherman

Well, Bill, we call him “wild Bill”, wasn’t real subtle about his faith. He just kind of went for the jugular: “Do you know Jesus?”  And God honored that. Bill Benson, in his own way, was representing Jesus Christ in the work place. He was letting his life be his ministry.

Patrick thought he was going to a mere garage sale. God had a larger purpose in mind.

The elderly couple who lived there were at odds. Although married for decades they hardly spoke. The wounds and neglect of years had calcified into a cold war. Even the yard sale bore signs of division: his items in this pile, hers in that.

Patrick asked questions. He got to know them a bit. This stranger dared to care for an elderly couple who were obviously living in pain.

Patrick was building a bridge of love that Jesus could walk across.

He was able to go back, and then back again.

The end of the story is not yet written, but Patrick is letting his life be his ministry. He needed no church program to schedule it, no pastor to tell him to reach out. All he needed was a heart of love open to the Holy Spirit’s prompting.

When we see our life as our ministry, life becomes a great adventure. Every day brings new possibilities. The mission stays as fresh as each new day, dripping with transformative possibilities.

That’s the kind of life God wants for us.

When I ask the question, “How well is my life being my ministry?” I have to grapple with the question of culture. How do I view the culture? Is the culture something totally evil that I must confront and stand against? Or, is the culture something totally good that I must embrace and engage?
Trust me on this, how one answers that question makes a huge different in the way they choose to live the Christian life.

Historically, many Christians have seen themselves (and Christ) as against the culture. The Amish are an extreme example of this. They believe that the best way to represent Christ to the culture is to “stand against it” by looking and thinking differently.

On the opposite extreme is the modern Prosperity Movement. They have literally baptized the American Dream and said that materialism is good. Don’t worry about what impact all these things may have on you. Christ wants you to have them and they are a sign of His blessing.

Most of us find ourselves somewhere in between.

I believe to represent Jesus well, we need to be in the culture but not of it. I see Christ not against the culture, not for the culture, but Christ transforming culture. Think of that! We are His ambassadors to transform the culture. But that means we have to be immersed in it while not taking on its values.

Welcome to the struggle!

I’m convinced that learning how to represent Jesus well is a life-long endeavor. That means throughout our lifetime there will always be an uneasy tension between us and the surrounding culture. Just as Jesus said the wheat and tares must grow up together until judgment, so we exist in a culture that often stands opposed to us, and we to it.

If we only stand against the culture, we are likely to alienate it. If we uncritically embrace the culture we are compromising our message and character. The key is to embrace what we can from the culture that is not evil, and to engage the other parts in order to bring the transforming message of Christ.

Does the phrase: “My life is my ministry” confuse you?

It is simply another way of saying that I am representing Jesus well everywhere I go. To do that well requires potency and proximity. Potency has to do with my spiritual strength, level of readiness and equipping. Proximity has to do with my closeness to unbelievers.

The formula goes like this: The greater my potency the greater my proximity can afford to be. But low potency makes high proximity potentially dangerous.

For instance, I am regularly asked questions similar to this: “Pastor Rex, as a Christian, should I still attend the block-parties with the neighbors on my street or the office parties with my co-workers?” When people ask that, they sound as though there is one answer that is appropriate for everyone.
There is not.

My answer is usually, “How high is your spiritual potency?” If they are well-grounded in scripture, walking victoriously with Christ, stable in their personal life, and generally mature, I’d say they need to be at those parties. That is the kind of spiritually potent Christian who is likely to make a positive difference. When neighbors or co-workers ask you to give a reason for the hope you have in Christ, you are likely to do it with clarity and confidence. The example you live out before them is also likely to be winsome and attractive. Why? Because you have high potency.

If, however, your spiritual potency is low, I’d caution you against too much fraternizing with people who may be cynical about Christianity. Your life may blatantly contradict much of what you are saying you believe and stand for. No one is ever a perfect representative for Jesus. But some are so bad it actually hurts the cause of Christ.

The ultimate goal of Grace Fellowship Church is to get Christians with high potency in situations of high proximity. That’s what it means to get the salt out of the salt-shaker.

The main reason we are on the planet is to represent Jesus Christ well.

We are His advertisements.

We are His hands and feet.

We are His mouthpieces.

We are His PR Agents.

We are His ambassadors.

We are His…

We are His…

The list could go on and on. The bottom line, however, is that we are His Church. And according to the Bible (Eph. 3:20-21) God wants the world to see His glory through us, His Church. When we represent Jesus well God’s glory comes through clearly. When we don’t represent Him well His glory is obscured.

For God’s glory (glory often refers to the fullness of God’s character, who He really is) to best be seen we must allow our lives, at all times and at all places to represent Him.

We don’t have a ministry.

Our life is our ministry.

This Saturday, March 21 is Grace Fellowship’s 16th Birthday. A few weeks ago I began talking about things I wish I’d known sixteen years ago before planting a church. The first one I named was the value of in-depth training. In this post I want to highlight another point that would have made a real difference.

I wish I’d known about “mission drift.”

I don’t know who first coined the phrase. But mission drift, for me, is that powerful tendency for churches to lose focus, to get priorities out of line, and to start doing things that contribute little, if anything, to the key mission. That is mission drift. You know it’s happened when people are very busy with “church activities” but with increasingly fewer Kingdom results.

How does it happen? I think it happens when we fail to run everything, and I mean everything, through the grueling filter that asks mission and purpose questions. “Will this cool new idea, whatever its upsides, detract from our main purpose and our reason for existing? At the end of the day, will it really help us make more and better disciples, or will it simply serve to keep saints busy with activity that sounds good but is not delivering the goods?”

Why didn’t someone beat me over the head and solemnly swear to me how important this is?

I’ve let some mission drift occur.

Don’t get me wrong. God’s blessing on Grace Fellowship is obvious and significant. Hundreds of lives have been positively and eternally changed. I could go on for literally hours explaining God’s impact through this congregation. Praise God.

But still, it has happened. We don’t have the sharp, 20-20 vision of the early days.

What should we do? Let’s get it back! As for me, I’m asking the hard questions again; filtering everything through that Spartan filter of mission and purpose. As we keep doing this, the most important things will become clearer and clearer.

Grace Fellowship is approaching its sixteenth birthday in March. We launched on March 21, 1993. Wow! That seems like an eternity ago!

As we approach another “birthday” I’ve had thoughts lately that I’ve seldom had before. In fact, I don’t remember ever having them. I’ve had the thought, “I’m sort of like a veteran now.” No, I didn’t get that thought because of a receding hairline or pain in my joints some mornings. No, I think it’s because I’ve been at this ministry thing a long time now.

That “veteran” feeling is bolstered by the fact that an increasing number of pastors and other leaders ask for input, advice, and opinions about various aspects of the ministry. On one level that is gratifying, but it is always sobering.

One of the frequently asked questions is, “What do you wish you’d known when you were starting Grace Fellowship?”

So, for the next few blogs I want to reflect on some things I wish I’d known sixteen years ago before planting a church.

I wish I’d known the value of in-depth training.

When Debbie and I started Grace Fellowship, I had been influenced by the school of thought that says, “Because most of us are educated far beyond our obedience, we should not be concerned about enhancing a person’s biblical knowledge or philosophical understanding. When it comes to discipleship training, just keep everything real basic.”

It is certainly true that most of us are educated far beyond our obedience. But one of the reasons some people struggle with consistent obedience is that, deep down, they don’t feel confident of what they say they believe and why it is relevant. Their enthusiasm to obey Christ in every aspect of life would be bolstered if they had better discipleship training. If they really felt they could defend the faith theologically, philosophically, and practically many would be far more courageous and obedient servants of Christ.

From my current perspective, I’d say in-depth training is one of the most valuable, long-term things the local church can provide. The crisis in American Christianity is the overall lack of quality in “the product.” The product I speak of, of course, is the Christians themselves. We are the product. The problem with Christianity is us.

Unless the overall depth of character and quality of spiritual life of the “typical” Christ-follower is enhanced, I feel the cause of Christ will be greatly impeded. Our message will always be heard in context with our character.

That’s one thing I wish I’d known. It would have caused me to devote more effort on in-depth character development and training in the discipleship process.

The series is off and running! Last weekend we talked about “life working better plugged in”. It was the first in an 8-part series on the Holy Spirit.

As anticipated, the questions are coming fast and furious. I was inundated with questions after each service. This subject makes a lot of people nervous. Many, many people have “horror stories” to share about previous experiences where they were taught certain things about the Spirit they subsequently discovered are not true. Some told of outright “religious abuse”, that is, cult-like psychological control where people claimed to be speaking for the Spirit, but were really using it to intimidate the person and control the agenda. One young lady came in tears and was very fearful about this topic because it evoked many fears related to her childhood church where talks about the Holy Spirit were a weekly occurrence. 

Few subjects I’ve ever tackled evoke as much intrigue and as many questions as the Holy Spirit.

I have many goals, aims, and hopes that I pray God will accomplish during these weeks. But my main desire is that each of us would be able to unleash The Holy Spirit’s power in our lives.

This series is about the Holy Spirit and you. I want to change, and I want you to change.

How would you currently characterize your relationship with God, the Holy Spirit? If He is not a Counselor who daily motivates, energizes and illuminates you, my prayer is that you will discover the life-changing refreshment of seeking to live moment-by-moment in step with the Spirit.

Let’s do this journey together.